What is a Munchy Box?
In the west of Scotland, in the towns and villages surrounding Glasgow, there is a delicacy available in some of the more discerning fast-food outlets. It’s called the Munchy Box (sometimes just Munch Box) and it’s a sight to behold. The one I bought for this article is a regular-sized one, in a 10″ pizza box for about a fiver, but they can come in 12″ or beyond for eight quid and up.
The box. Give me the box.
Upon opening your Jock Monsieur, you will see a layer of Doner Kebab meat on top of a Naan Bread, maybe with some Glasgow Salad (chips) poking out from underneath. The wonders that await!
We need a bigger boat
Once the top layer has been removed, you can clearly see the two tubs of Sauce, the Glasgow Salad on the left and the Crappy Salad in the middle with the Onion Rings, Pakora and Chicken Tikka all huddled together for warmth on the right.
All that heavenly Glory
As a serving suggestion, I’ve laid it out with the crappy salad atop the chips, a piece of chicken tikka balanced on top of the salads, an onion ring surrounding a piece of pakora, a wall of doner meat served with a feuille of naan with a choice of two sauces. Sparkling Italian rosé replaced the traditional Irn Bru, but purists be damned!
A wafer thin mint, monsieur?
Or, alternatively, you could just shovel half down your Tennents-lined gullet whilst dropping the other half (crappy salad deliberately, the rest less so) on the pavement.
Next time, I may brave the hallowed Pizza Crunch Supper for your delection. With a half-pizza deep fried in chip-shop batter and piled on a wodge of chips, it truly is the champion of the artery-hardeners.
About the author. I’m an Englishman that lives in Scotland. I used to live here a while back, and in the last year just returned here after 8 years in Paris. This will give my culture shock the background it needs. My Munchy Box was the £4.95 10″ from Tandoori Nights, Stonehouse. Clicking on any images will bring up a 1920px wide version. Comments would be vastly appreciated.
so much food, so little money …
Always nice to see an Englishman (another country known for great Culinary tradition) comment on Scottish “fine cuisine”. To me this does not look any different in presentation and/or nutritional value than any other overcooked pub lunch you get in England!
Nice to see a local “delicacy” on the net, the munchy box is the king of meals after a night on the “sauce” its pretty good stuff, true probably about as unhealthy as you can get, but its worth it!! ( i think i’ll be calling flames and getting me one of these later on)
(it was obvious you werent scottish from readin the article, only people who arent scottish thinks we drink tennants, its bath water!!)
“To me this does not look any different in presentation and/or nutritional value than any other overcooked pub lunch you get in England!”
I can second that with certainty!!!
Wish I was still living in Stonehouse
I would have washed that lovely nosh down with a bottle of Buckfast
I am sure you miss a good old fashioned ‘grec frites’
Well, a mate of mine in Dubai mailed me a link to this, so you would have appeared to have gone global with this little piece of traditional Scottish cuisine!
Here’s to the new national dish!
Fuck me, it’s looks like my wifes cunt..!!!
rofl
I remember having the dubious honour of trying to eat one of these last year, whilst visiting my sister. I recall eating rather a lot of it, but appearing to make no impact on the size of the food mountain in front of me.
I wonder just how many days it took off my life?
Looks awesome and reminds me of the time I lived near Edinburgh - I remember well my first ever deep fried pizza (with salt ‘n’ soss) - terrific!
Hmmm thats makes me hungry. A++ on presentation.
That is the most glorious thing I have ever seen. My life has changed now i’ve seen the munchy box. How I got here I’ll never know , I was only searching google for “deep fried opal fruits”
Agg god, a munchie box.
the most delicious delecacy this side of port glasgow
I’ve just had breakfast, but it’s making me hungry again. It must be the /4 Scottish in me!!
We just need to get munchy-box-eating recognised as an Olympic sport. It’ll be Scotland vs USA I think in first two places, maybe Aus in bronze?
That’s awful, it looks like someone has thrown up in a box.
they are in demand:
http://www.inverclydenow.com/news-detail4.asp?ID=2077
Far too healthy…Not a patch on the good ol’ scottish chinky!!
Jared, ” Now fuck off out of my kitchen “….lol
ps, Would’nt be great if you could order one of these to your door……
Several places round here do indeed deliver them to your door. However, as reported above in Inverclyde Now, delivery drivers may get mugged for them.
Lets just say, with Barr’s finest, this goes down a treat. AND keeps well for breakfast!
I phone and order the great Munchy Box often,delivered to my door with a 2 litre bottle of Irn Bru.
Never finished one yet and there’s foru of us in here. takes great the next day ‘het up’
This food is a dietary staple in Merseyside and my daughter’s favourite meal, despite which she maintains a Kate Moss-esque figure (How unfair). Can’t quite stomach it myself :o)
Amazing. We don’t get this delight on the South Coast but I can imagine it’s a taste explosion followed by a coronary. I also think that it looks like Bootay’s wife’s badger.
Once in a while, but not often, we need coronary food …as well it sounds great especially if its named after me….the FOOD LOVER, and this one is good after a few Bodis or so :o)
I am the Munch !
Emmmmmmmmmmmmmmm Nice. Now I am vegetarian if I wasn’t I would have gone through that no problem. After a night out that would be fantastic the greasy food delicious!!!
Oh my god, this looks delicious, and as I am hungry at the moment you totally made my stomach sing
just returned from a semester in Stirling, Scotland. the munch box was a weekly takeaway purchase for my flat. or just me…
It’s like a kebab meal-deal! I need to find somewhere in Huddersfield that does these…
Lols… sweet.
I live in Rochester, NY and we have something similar. We call it a Garbage Plate and I had never heard of them until I moved to Western NY. They are scrumptious, and usually just what you need after a long night out.
http://rocwiki.org/Garbage_Plates
yum! now i have to go get one….
That would be simply delicious atop a gallon of bargain supermarket vodka.
As I said on Twitter you’ve put me in the mood for a munchy box but after reading the comments I’m wishing I could get a chicken donner sarbeni from Riginals just round from Central Station or whatever colour they’ve decided to call it these days.
NASTY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I’ve sent this to my husband and I imagine he’s looking for flights up that way right now - this looks totally up his street!
Why???????
I’m moving to Scotland and that’s all there is to it, I don’t know why my ancestors left the place but after seeing this I wish they hadn’t.
I hope I can find something like this in Edinburgh next week.
@Philippe
Mate you are delusional! This is a heart attack in a box I wouldn’t think a cheese ploughmans or a roast dinner would come anywhere near this in terms of junk value!
This is quite simply a work of genius and looks sensational.
Scotland leads where others are frightened to tread.
I have done the Calzone and chips with extra chillies in a box before before, but never anything as punishing as this. I’d imagine you feel like you’d done ten rounds with Tyson in the morning, but doubtlessly worth every hungover sick feeling moment.
I salute the commitment to Junk Food.
Dirty food mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm!!!
That’s a lot of food there
I live just outside Edinburgh and you get a munch box here in a 12″ box. It has doner meat and chips, 2 chicken pakoras, 2 vegetable pakoras and a 10″ ”cheese and tamatty” pizza. All for the shockingly low price of £6.
Boo Yaa. Thats what I’m having for eats tonight.
Wonderful wonderful fried delights! Alas, we have no such food here in the cultural barrens, however I would recommend a hoppy IPA to cut the palette.
Cheers!
Why did I ever leave Scotland? I hate my wife for making me move to the South of England, I’m so far away from home and miss the comforts of good old Proper Scottish portions of food!